Jeez…


I think most people who know me know that I’m very opinionated (to a fault mostly) and I generally don’t let people boss me around. I say generally because this isn’t always true. There has been one big exception to that. I tend to pick guys who are too controlling. Not recently, but in my past.

I could tell everyone else where to stick it but when it came to guys, I picked the ones that kinda took advantage of the fact that I loved them. What I mean by this is, once they knew they had me, that’s when our relationship would change; they’d go from a loving, caring boyfriend who seemed to want to be in a relationship, to a guy who felt I should bow down and beg him for his love. It ceased to be us and turned into him.

What I don’t understand is how these types of people can stay under the radar and don’t show their ugly behaviors sooner in the relationship. It would save me a lot of time. I think a relationship should have a mutual understanding that both people matters. Isn’t that what a relationship is? What is the point of being in a relationship when only one person matters? You might as well be alone.

Luckily, I now recognize the traits and know when I am in the presence of a person who is going to treat me like that. I let someone control me a long time ago and it almost cost me something that means more to me in the world, that is if he would have gotten his way. I was smart and realized that it was my life and if he loved me, he’d be there for me.

The point of all this is, recently one of these toxic people came back into my life. Thanks to a lot of previous practice, I figured out how toxic they were and I’ve limited my exposure to them. It’s also made me extremely thankful for the friends and family I do have. Especially Baby Bird Girl, Squarepants John, Michelle, Nick, Josh, Eileen, Eric, Witwicky and even Chewie. These are only to name a few of the ones I see everyday but even those not listed, you are also something I’m very thankful for.

I’m pretty lucky.

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