I don’t even know what to title this post. I am so beyond furious. I have never in my life had someone make me feel as awful as a person I just got rid of, within the last 5 minutes, in my life. That person made it their goal in life to tear me down completely, to make sure that I knew I didn’t do shit right. Well, good riddance.
You try your best to be a good person. You try your best to appreciate what life has brought you. You try your best just to struggle to get through every day. Yet, it’s not good enough and it never will be. Why are there some people who feel that way? Why are there people who must constantly tear others down to make themselves feel better? I won’t have it anymore. I’m done with it and if you’re like that, you aren’t welcome in my life.
There are people who I believe I haven’t appreciated. I wish I called my best friend more. I wish I contacted my favorite guy friend more. I wish I didn’t have to study so much and go to school so that I can spend more time with my family. Those people I haven’t appreciated enough, no one else.
What a complete and utter waste of time. 13 years of time that I will never, ever get back. I won’t be that stupid again, that’s for sure. If this was happening a couple of days ago, I would have felt like I was losing my best friend but I’m not. I’m losing someone who constantly tore me down and told me how I’m the worst person in the world. At the time, I thought I was doing everything wrong and I needed to change. Now I know that I could have changed every single thing about myself and that wouldn’t have made them happy. The people who I have kept in my life are the people who matter and they have never asked me to change everything about myself. Again, I didn’t appreciate their value and how much they meant to me and I to them. I’m truly sorry.
So from this moment on, I am appreciating the things that I do have. The guarantees in life and the things I’m entitled too. I appreciate every single person that I consider a friend, ex boyfriend, family member, church member or what have you. If you are on my Facebook, I appreciate you. I hope you know that. There are some very, very important people in my life that I will make sure I keep in contact with more often and they know that I appreciate them. Without these people, I wouldn’t be who I am or able to do half the things I do today. I’m sorry if you ever felt you weren’t appreciated or loved greatly.
To that one person who is gone, thanks for taking my self-esteem, my security and my general good mood with you. Get lost.