Sad and depressing

I know that my post have been a little sad and depressing lately. I’ve gotten into a funk that I haven’t been able to get out of. I think my main problem is I’m overwhelmed with what is going on in my life with school, relationships and just about everything else.

Another problem I have is I tend to only want to type on here when something is going wrong. Like a big, online journal; which I guess in a way, it is but there are good things going on in my life and they deserve some time mentioned also. Plus, everyone won’t think I’m emo. Which I guess I sort of am sometimes.

I’ll start with school. While it is completely overwhelming and I know I’ve bitten off more than I can chew sometimes, it’s getting better and it’s worth it. I know it’s worth it because I know this is what I want to do when I grow up and it will ensure that I am able to take care of the kids and help them when they need me. But it is overwhelming, extremely. After recently comparing course work with someone else, I realize for my level I’m getting the shit end of the stick when it comes to amount. I guess that’s fine too because if anything I know how to write a really good paper in a short period of time.

The kids are getting smarter than me every day. The little one is gone right now but she’ll be back soon. The big one is gone all the time but she’s a teenager and her friends are all that exist right now. That’s fine too. The fact that they aren’t mad at me for being gone all the time (except for the infrequent comment “You’re missing my child hood!” from the little one which usually follows me not buying her something) makes everything okay.

I think I know now why I wait until I’m pissed, sad or depressed to post on here, these regular post are super boring. I’ve managed to bore myself completely and I was the one writing it.


2 thoughts on “Sad and depressing

  1. you are not boring, you are just experiencing life. It has lots of ups and downs and I think you handle them with great strength. I know your kids are going to be fine because you are that kind of mom, so what if you do things differently, thats what makes you unique. That is the reason Don fell for you. He would be so proud of all you have accomplishd and I hope you find the right guy for you, you deserve to be happy, You know you are a worthy person so don’t let anyone ever take advantage of you. I love you and respect you with all my heart, gail

    • Having a guy is great but I am not going to worry about it anymore. Not that I ever was but it’s so many ups and downs. I just need to learn how to focus on my priorities.

      I let things get to me too easily. I’m not the best person but I am good at somethings. I love the kids and I will make sure they have everything they need.

      I miss Don. I wish sometimes he was here because he knew how to keep me motivated.

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